Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Mysterious Shopping Cart Disappearances Elude Cops, Draw Support from Rich Morons

These flyers were at the checkouts of the grocery store last week. Considering this particular store is in Collingwood, I'm not sure how the trolleys' owners can remain this baffled.

Even I, a non-junkie, know that the bench in front of the store is a hot spot for scoring smack; across the street in two directions are popular places for outdoor drinking at 9am. It's Smith Street for Chrissake—a road I once described to my sister as the Old West, if you added tacky aluminum awnings, dollar stores, tram lines, drunk Aboriginals and toothless heroin addicts. Charming, no?

Actually, it is. Maybe it's because this street was my first exposure to Australia—back when I came to visit husband back when he was my bf—but Smith Street on a sunny day is probably where I'm most at home here.

But another street in Melbourne, Sydney Road, which features many of Smith Street's characteristics, is just ugly and depressing to me. I can't really tell you why, although part of it is also that people like Sydney Road better than Smith Street, and I'm an underdog kind of girl. [Locals: don't argue with me on this. You will not change my mind. Yes, Ray has the best coffee evs. I don't care.]

Anyway, I'm neglecting my point. Then again, so are those trying to "clean up our streets" by offering rewards for missing carts.

6 comments:

Colleen said...

Hee. Trollys. I bet they call baby carriages "prams," too. Look down in a ditch, that's a good spot for runaway trollys. You can get a reward!

Colleen said...

Oops, I mean trolleys. My spelling is getting worse lately.

Ralph Steinway said...

I'm with you, Sydney rd is turd, although they do have a Kmart....

Colleen said...

i'm with ralph and his use of "turd" as a descriptor. the kids really are using that word there!

Huggy said...

Sydney Road has its own charm, but the charm has nothing to do with its looks, thats for sure. It's all about being able to eat yourself around the world and share the street with people from all around the globe: little Greek grandmas in their sensible black outfits, African mothers in head-to-toe burkas pushing adorable pudgy babies in strollers, groups of young Indian men waiting for the tram to Melbourne Uni, Italian grocers unloading boxes of fruit... Try these foody delights: a meltingly hot cheese and spinach pastry straight out of the oven from A1 Bakery, a box of luscious cookies from Axilleon Cake Shop while the TV in the top corner blares awesome Greek video clips, a super fresh and tasty shish kebab from the halal restaurant near the Mediterranean Wholesalers (I think its called Tiba's) where the steely eyed mullah stares disapprovingly at you from the large gold framed picture on the wall... and the list goes on. I have to stop to eat, I've made myself hungry.

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